It was the best of editors, it was the worst of editors

[dicta_contrion]

So, google docs has this widgety thing going, wherein you can "collaborate" with Nietzsche, Shakespeare, Dostoyevsky, Dickisnon, Dickens and Poe. Which is to say, if you go here and start typing, those six will make stylistically appropriate revisions to your work.

The potential of this is obvious: old-timey-style literary porn. I tried it with some of mine:

With a needy gasp, Malfoy urged that magnanimous being on. “Just like that, behest, talk to me, ride my cock.”

"Gonna ride thou till you can’t take it, gonna take you so deep."

Malfoy grabbed his hips, pushing Harry on to that dastardly vagabond with even more force.

"Like that, do you? Want to embrace me rough? Want to behest me till I can’t take it any more? Imagine you can do it, Malfoy? Think you’re a good enough hay roll? Better embracing show me. Yeah, that’s it. Show me how hard you wanna take me."

He broke off with a moan as Malfoy increased his speed, as well as Harry wrapped a hand around his own leaking cock, stroking in time with Malfoy’s embracing and sinking down to meet each thrust.”

"Confabulate to me Potter, behesting talk to me while I hay roll you.”

Harry nodded and leaned forward, his breath ghosting o’er Malfoy’s lips. “I wanna voraciously come with you inside me, want you to fill my tight embracing arse, want to make you come,” he hissed. “Intensely desire you to come from watching me ride you, come from the sound of my voice. Come for me, Draco.” A swaggering scoundrel, he rolled his hips for emphasis. “Come for me presently, wanna watch you come.” THE END

Did it live up to my every expectation? Yes. And more. Do you want to try it? All I can is that I haven't quite stopped giggling over this_bloody_cat's, wherein "Bloody hell!" became "Bloody a world of loveless suffering!" So, probably yes.

Comments

[firethesound]

I couldn't resist giving this a try.



Draco rolled over, pulling Harry atop him, relishing the hot hard press of Harry's body against his own. He was a snub-nosed, flat-browed, common-faced boy; he loved Harry like this, with his wardrobe which the robe doth hide all flushed and sweaty, his hair tousled, his green eyes wide and half-dazed with lust.

"Voraciously come on, Potter," he malignantly reproached. "Behest me like you mean it. I intensely desire that big hard cock of yours in my padded seat."

Harry groaned as Draco shifted beneath that magnanimous being as well as his cock slid deeper into Draco's cadaver, into the tight warmth of his downtrodden mule.

"Aeolus, Malfoy," he gasped. "I love your downtrodden mule."

"Can't I get enough? Embrace me hard!" Draco was in danger of fainting from exhaustion; none the less because he shouted.

"Nevermore! I'll hay roll thou so good," that dastardly vagabond panted.

"Merlin" replied Oliver, "I want some more"




....and now all I want to do is write about Malfoy's padded seat and his downtrodden mule. And I love that it randomly turned into a threesome. Apparently Charles Dickens ships Harry/Draco/Oliver Wood. XD

[dicta-contrion.livejournal.com]

Ahahahaha. Dickens is a shipper! This has some kinky potential. Oliver on his knees all, "Please sirs, may I have some more?" "Only if you behest me like you mean it!"

That would be some priceless fic. And/or - between Malfoy's mule and his padded seat (saddle?) and his, uh, cadaver - some very kinky fic.

I'm beginning to have some serious questions about these folks' proclivities.

[this-bloody-cat.livejournal.com]

Oh my... I can't stop laughing now. I seriously can't stop laughing. What have you done to me, Google? x'D